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12.18.2002 - 7:01 p.m.

Wednesday

At work the other day:

A: "So according to our online store, we should hit the one million dollar mark sometime tomorrow".
Me: "We should somehow make it so that the customer see balloons and confetti and big announcements telling them they are our one million dollar customer!"
A: (in Very Dire tones) "I really don't think we should tell our customers how much money we've made."
Me: "Oh, I think we should tell all of our customers everything. What size shoe we wear...our darkest secret dreams...."
S: (piping in) "I *really* think it's a bad idea to tell our customers how much money we've made."
Me: (giving up): "Guys. I was kidding. KIDDING."
A: (droningly): "For one thing, the engineering effort would be enormous and -"
S: (broken record) "Telling our customers how much money we've made is a *really* bad idea."
Me: "KIDDING. I was JOKING. I WASN'T SERIOUS."
A: "Another reason it's a bad idea is..."

Gah. GAH. Working with engineers. GAH.

It's the truth that for a majority of Workplace geeks, their favorite activity in the whole wide world is sinking their pointy little teeth into a given subject and holding on for dear life. At the end of the day you've got a wet, gnawed-up piece of crap, but that's about it.

Do I like my job? I guess the most honest response I can come up with is "sometimes". But that's probably the case for most people.

The one thing that makes me most unhappy about Workplace is that I don't have a mentor. How does a marketing person get things done in a company full of engineers who like to criticize almost every single decision but have no real life marketing experience of their own? It's not always easy, or fun. At the prime time in my career/life, I'm missing out on the opportunity to be learning from someone. Someone with managerial strengths, marketing savvy. Someone who occasionally says, "Nice job." Or, "here's how I think you could have done that better."

But no, it's just me. Trying to please the ultra-conservative one, the paranoid one, the clueless one, the out-on-a-limb one, the 15 year old one - while trying to feel good about what I do along the way. Sometimes it's ok, sometimes it sucks.

Who ever had a job that didn't? Suck sometimes, I mean. Right?

Myeh.

I'm just grumpy because I'm mired in tradeshow preparation hell, yet again. What sadist scheduled Macworld (Geekapalooza 2003) for right after the holidays, that's what I want to know.

I did have a fun afternoon yesterday at work. There's been this packet of Harry Potter Bertie Botts jellybeans lying around the office for weeks on end, and I decided we needed to do an official Workplace Taste Test. I tried the Sardine flavor first.

Scott: "Well?"
Me (chewing): "It's like...it's...OHH GOD IT'S SO HORRIBLE. BLEAARGH. Glack. Mylmp."
Scott: "I'm going to try Dirt." (chew chew) "Huh, tastes just like dirt."
Me: "Try the Vomit!"
Scott (clearly insane): "Ok!" (chew) "It's kind of...no, it's just awful. Awful."

I tried Grass, Dirt, and Spinach, but I drew the line at Vomit.

Later I offered a Sardine bean to Funky Boss, who cheerily accepted ("I like sardines!"). It went like this:

1) Gamely chewing with vaguely expectant look.
2) Dawning expression of sheer disgust and horror.
3) Frantic spitting and clawing at tongue with tissue.

When I got home I gave one to JB, and watched the whole show all over again. Whee!

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