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03.23.2003 - 12:23 p.m.


"One you lock the target
Two you bait the line
Three you slowly spread the net
And four you catch the man."

Can you Name That Song? I've been wiggling all over the house to it this morning, because apparently I am flashing back to like 1989 or something. I've been a downloading fool the last couple of days, which means the dog has been subjected to abnormal amounts of paw-grabbing and "dancing" around, which she so far seems to tolerate but it's likely only a matter of time before she bites my jugular in response to my annoying behavior and cries of "Shake that dog booty!"

Here's what I've acquired in the last 48 hours: 5 Erasure songs, because how great is Erasure? I had forgotten! How fun is it to sing "Oh L'amour" at the very top of your lungs while boogying around the living room?

So! Fun!

Also 50 Cent, Siouxsie & the Banshees ("Kiss Them For Me", I LOVE that song), Shakira, Young MC (because what's wrong with "Bust A Move"? Fucking nothing, that's right), Fat Boy Slim, Depeche Mode, Pink, Tatu, Kylie Minogue, Duran Duran, and The Bloodhound Gang.

And uh. Uh…Britney Spears. I - uh. Does it help if it's a club remix? Of that "Slave 4 U" song? No? Not so much?

Oh, and Metallica's "Whiskey in the Jar", because that song rules.

I have a mp3 challenge, which is to find Tones on Tail's "Go!", and Nitzer Ebb's "Control I'm Here". No one seems to be sharing those tunes, and for whatever reason I've decided I want them both badly. So, you know, this weekend isn't all about the slacking. I've got goals.


Boy, did I ever see a crappy movie yesterday. Take it from your old pal Sundry, Dreamcatcher is a stinker. But! You have to go see it so you can catch The Animatrix: Final Flight of the Osiris. Because that? Was so totally fucking cool.

Oh, I guess Dreamcatcher had its moments. I scrunched down in my seat a couple of times and did my patented blurred-vision routine (that's where you deliberately unfocus your eyes during the scary parts of a movie so you don't look like a wuss). Other than the few satisfyingly startling gooey scenes, though, I second this comment on IMDB: "The acting is wildly uneven, the script is chock-full of cliches and the plot is all over the place, spanning from coming-of-age tale to horror film to military thriller to sci-fi to teen fart comedy."

On the other hand, if you require nothing more in your movie watching experience than the depiction of aliens, take heart from this comment: "I highly recommend this movie to all alien fans. 10/10."


I went to my horrible terrible two hour long kickboxing class yesterday morning. 10:30 to 12:30. That's a long time to pray for death, people.

I think everyone in the class succumbs partway through to a type of Stockholm Syndrome, where the pain and the agony just make us love the instructor more. She puts us through this monstrous drill, over and over, and each time we CLAP and YELL at the end. Like "Hooray for us! Our lungs have collapsed and giant rips have appeared in the walls of our hearts! Wheee!"

Towards the end, we had to partner up for some punching routines. (I hate this. She goes "Find a partner! Find a partner! NOW!", and I am instantly transported through time to some soul-destroying gym class where everyone has a partner except ME.) So I look around, and the only person looking back at me is this 7 foot tall guy. Fine. So I have to hold a punching mat up in the air which he's supposed to hit, except he's, you know, mega fucking tall, and I'm 5' 5", and my arms are screaming and he's frankly hitting just a smidge too hard and damn, it goes on for about half an hour before we switch, and then he's "motivating" me with some stupid Richard Simmons yells ("Go, girl!") and I think very, very seriously about kicking him in the shin.

Today I've got skinned and bruised knuckles from all the punching, which I secretly think makes me look cool.


Number of mud puddles in backyard: two (large)
Number of labrador retrievers owned: one
Number of times have used "Resolve" carpet cleaner in the last two days: 48922546978362

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1 comments so far.

I have moved. - 1.03.2005
Obviously, a work in progress. - 12.27.2004
Happy holidays! - 12.24.2004
Listen, I am not a complete dick, it's not like I want Joe to die alone surrounded by cats or something. - 12.23.2004
Plus I am convinced my butt is extra big when it's upside down. - 12.22.2004

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