02.04.2003 - 9:32 p.m.
Tuesday
Hello, I am Daruma-san!
I live on Sundry's desk where she can see me all the time, and
I say things like "Hello fatass! Please to put the fucking
cashew nut down, now!"
Sometimes she whine,
"Shut UP, Daruma-san! I like cashew nuts!" Then I say
"Why don't you call someone who actually care what
you like, Sundry?"
And I get out a phone and pretend like I call someone. I think
that so totally a burn, don't you?
When I want make Sundry
mad, I say "Have a banana! See, it look like a big happy
yellow smile! It smiling at YOU!" And she say - well, Daruma-san
does not like to repeat.
This Aragorn. He live
in the corner of Sundry's office. He spend his time "protecting
Sundry from orks" which frankly Daruma-san find quite amusing.
Sundry like to look at him and sigh a lot. I tell her, "You
never catch Aragorn eye with big fat giant ass like that!"
Then I pretend to call Aragorn on the phone. I say, "Aragorn
says yes he agrees, you have fat ass. I am so sorry."
You may think Daruma-san
is too hard on Sundry, but helping someone fulfill goal very
hard work. If Daruma-san does not watch, Sundry cram cashew nuts
in mouth. She also eat vanilla latte. Plus she sit at desk all
day which give her big giant ass!
Daruma-san not alone
in ass-shrink effort. Nike bag says can help too. Sundry moan
and whimper about Nike bag but I tell her shut up. Then I pretend
to call her ass. "Hello," I say, "You so fat you
beep when back up."
Ha ha, Daruma-san is
so funny.
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I have moved. - 1.03.2005 Obviously, a work in progress. - 12.27.2004 Happy holidays! - 12.24.2004 Listen, I am not a complete dick, it's not like I want Joe to die alone surrounded by cats or something. - 12.23.2004 Plus I am convinced my butt is extra big when it's upside down. - 12.22.2004
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