12.21.2002 - 3:34 p.m.
Saturday
I went to the grocery store
today and bought pecans and fruit and flour and sugar and candy
and all kinds of shit and I felt all excited when I brought
everything home, like hey! I'm hosting Christmas, godammit!
I'm an ADULT!
JB's parents are arriving tomorrow
and will stay through the holiday. I have to *cook* stuff, stuff
that can't accidentally suck because do I really want to be the
one who made the Christmas dinner that blew goats it was
so bad? No I do not. So today I will bake cinnamon bread and
make granola and tomorrow I will bake a pecan pie and a blackberry
pie and later there will be green beans and yams and rolls and
it will all be very Un-Sundry and nothing better burn or taste
like ass or poison anyone.
Also, there will be mulled
wine.
:::
I've been obsessively listening
to Aimee Mann's Lost in Space since I bought it a few weeks
ago. Man, that's a great fucking CD. Her voice, her lyrics, everything
is flawless.
I've also been listening to
a ton of Eminem. I know: today's musical selection brought to
you by the Center for Split Personality Disorders!
So baby kiss me like a drug
like a respirator
and let me fall into the dream of the astronaut
where I get lost in space that goes on forever
and you make all the rest just an afterthought
-vs-
Bitch please
you must have a mental disease
Assume the position
and get back down on your knees
I like variety, is that so
wrong?
:::
I got a present for my coworker
Molly today. I had been wrestling with whether or not I should
get something for her, because we are friends after all,
but I didn't want to get something for her if she wasn't going
to get something for me, because I didn't want to make her feel
awkward or seem somehow pathetic in my gift-offering (clumsily
thrusting the present into her reluctant hands, shyly avoiding
her face), so I just put it off. And when I showed up for work
on Friday, there was a lovely bag on my desk that contained a
pretty candleholder with a dragonfly motif and a candle that
smelled marvelous, which was very thoughtful on her part because
I love and collect dragonfly stuff and there are about 298301932813
candles in my house. So I felt like a humongous asshole.
(Not actually a large, gaping
anus - I mean just like a, you know, really bad person.)
Anyway my plan for her present
is a hinged thingie with like 6 small photo frames connected
together. I'm going to print pictures from her treasure hunt
engagement day and have the last photo be of her boyfriend on
bended knee and her all crying and looking cute and shit.
I may be a social retard, but
I still give good presents, dammit.
Happy happy holidays!
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I have moved. - 1.03.2005 Obviously, a work in progress. - 12.27.2004 Happy holidays! - 12.24.2004 Listen, I am not a complete dick, it's not like I want Joe to die alone surrounded by cats or something. - 12.23.2004 Plus I am convinced my butt is extra big when it's upside down. - 12.22.2004
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