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10.30.2002 - 8:27 a.m.
Wednesday
What you need to remember is
how it feels when you get in your car and sling your gym bag
over the seat turn on the ignition flip the heat off and a Peter
Gabriel song is playing, In Your Eyes, one of your favorite songs,
and you are surprised to get a signal at all since you are two
layers deep in a parking garage but fuck it, turn it up and sing
along, the light the heat, and you pull out into the cold
crisp night air and drive along 148th on the way back home and
you're feeling good, feeling healthy, feeling your muscles pop
and buzz with oxygen, a thousand churches, and you're
glad you went glad you finally mustered the gumption because
it's been a while, hasn't it, yeah you're ashamed to say so but
it has been months since you've seen the inside of this gym and
they've done all this construction which left you wandering around
embarrassed couldn't find the fucking locker room for a while
and everything is shiny and expensive just like the people there
but at least you finally went and what you need to remember next
time you hem and haw and think you'd rather do something else
is that right now you feel great like a million bucks and that
new Eminem song is playing which you turn up to ELEVEN, man,
the music the moment, and you realize that for the first
time all day that annoying eye twitch you've been having lately
is completely gone and that feels healthy like maybe your body
is telling you something about getting away from a monitor for
more than five minutes in a row is a good thing and oh no not
that godawful Pearl Jam Jeremy song you fucking hate that song
all that wailing and moaning so you change the channel and hey!
Pink! you need to do this more need to get your lazy butt in
motion move muscles breathe faster get the party started because
otherwise you will rot be stagnate turn to dusty crumbled mummy
wraps and blow away in the first strong wind and it's worth it,
even if it's hard sometimes, even if you look up at the giant
mirrored wall and there are so many people struggling, running
walking heaving weights staring at themselves, all the women
trying to take up less space while the men try to take up more,
even if you feel like every eye that meets yours is assessing
and judging and finding you wanting, it's worth it because you
always feel good afterwards and why is that so hard to remember?
go back :::
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0
comments so far.
I have moved. - 1.03.2005
Obviously, a work in progress. - 12.27.2004
Happy holidays! - 12.24.2004
Listen, I am not a complete dick, it's not like I want Joe to die alone surrounded by cats or something. - 12.23.2004
Plus I am convinced my butt is extra big when it's upside down. - 12.22.2004
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