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11.10.2004 - 10:22 a.m.

Wednesday

I've missed a bunch of work this week because of an evil plague that swept through Workplace, felling all in its path, and do you know what I've been doing with all my copious free time?

I BET YOU DID NOT GUESS KNITTING.

Or maybe you did. Hell, everyone's knitting these days. Knitting: the New Black.

I have my good friend Chiara to thank for my newfound skillz. During our Sunday visit that consisted of such fabulous activities as eating french toast (did you know it is possible to make french toast with CROISSANTS because oh, it is) and wantonly stealing each other's music, she taught me - so very patiently, because I have the hand-eye coordination of a Thorazine-dart-struck chimpanzee - how to cast on, then how to knit rows.

From the very beginning, it appeared I was not what you might call a knitting prodigy, what with my habit of staring fixedly at the yarn for upwards of fifteen minutes while loudly breathing through my mouth, and all. I spent a large amount of time on both Sunday and Monday knitting the same clumsy 5 rows over and over again - ham-fistedly creating stitches that meandering drunkenly all over the place, then giving up and ripping them all out with savage glee.

At some point in the day yesterday, my hands seemed to finally get it, the under-pullthrough-over action moving along almost naturally, and now I'm well on my way to creating a purple and cream and green scarf that may actually turn out pretty, as long as I don't drop a stitch, please god let me not drop a stitch.

As you may know, the much-anticipated Halo 2 came out this week. If you were to press an ear to our front door these last few nights, you'd have heard some embarrassing snatches of one-sided conversation.

"Okay, should I get the shotgun...? Yeah, I'm gonna take that."

"Cat, please get off the needles."

"Is that - jesus, that's a huge-ass robot SPIDER. Babe, check that out!"

"Man, my hands are starting to hurt."

"DIE YOU BASTARDS DIE!!!" (blam blam blam blam pow blam kablooey)

"You know, I think I'll try that crazy eyelash yarn next."

"Arrrgh, I'm dead! Dammit, I was almost to the the next checkpoint."

You know, embarrassing in a "Me woman, me play with yarn while man shoots dinner" kind of way.


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23 comments so far.

I have moved. - 1.03.2005
Obviously, a work in progress. - 12.27.2004
Happy holidays! - 12.24.2004
Listen, I am not a complete dick, it's not like I want Joe to die alone surrounded by cats or something. - 12.23.2004
Plus I am convinced my butt is extra big when it's upside down. - 12.22.2004

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