08.10.2003 - 2:35 p.m.
As I write this, JB is somewhere
on Mt. Rainier, heading for base camp at 10,000 feet. He'll stay
there, at Camp Muir, until around midnight when they rope up
and make for the summit - a steep and steady slog that takes
around seven hours.
Unless the weather shits the
bed. I don't know what conditions are like on the mountain but
here in Bellevue it's been raining all morning long, complete
with rumbling thunder which caused a very nervous Dog to crawl
halfway up my ass. If they encounter crappy weather they'll either
have to turn back partway into the climb, or make the decision
not to leave Muir at all. Either way would be a huge disappointment
for JB, who's been waiting months for this trip.
I hope he makes it to the top,
to appease his summit fever, but most of all I just want him
off the damn mountain safe and sound.
I am spending my Sunday in
what I believe to be a comparable fashion. The challenge of
physical endurance, the imminent danger, the sheer adventurous
thrill! …uh, of sitting around with dirty hair drinking
coffee and wearing a giant sloppy t-shirt with "Rogue Brutal
Bitter (Brutalize Me!)" printed on it. Yeaaah.
My relative sloth today had
me thinking of the process of setting goals, and how I so rarely
follow through on, well, anything. Witness my New Year's thoughts:
I Will Get In Shape This
Year. I will go to the gym, even if it's dark and I'm tired and
hungry and every molecule in my body is screaming to go home
and become one with the couch. I will eschew, not chew, Workplace's
more fattening dinners and lunches in favor of greens and fiber!
I will look good in the fake leather halter top I bought once
in a fit of optimism/insanity.
Pfft. I don't even know what
to say about this. I was doing really well until our cruise,
and I just haven't done very well since. And yes, the cruise
was in fucking MAY and it is now AUGUST. It's depressing, and
it's the same old goddamn story. I will never understand how
I can so readily succumb to bad habits when I am so much happier
and healthier when I am more disciplined. Sigh, moving on…
I will get rid of this confounded
cold before the end of 2003.
Well hey. Looky there, I actually
accomplished something I said I was going to. Sure, I've spent
most of the summer snurfling with allergies, but that's different.
I will continue to spend
happy weekends rooting around in Half Price Books like a truffle-hunting
How is that even a New Year's
goal? That's cheating, is what that is. I mean, DUH. That
store would have to burn to the ground for me to stop pillaging
there on a regular basis.
I will try to help make
Oh, boy. There's a book I could
write on that subject, not that it would be a very interesting
book or come with a nice cover or include lots of smoking hot
sex scenes. So, you know, it wouldn't be a bestseller or anything.
In fact, it would be whiny and stupid and lame. I have just decided
not to write this book!
I'll say this: I do believe
I am trying to help make Workplace succeed, although I could
probably be doing a much better job.
I will wear 'smoky' eye
makeup at least once.
No! I have not! I don't even
know how to do this! Damn.
I will mince around in front
of JB in sleazy lingerie and clear plastic heels.
Uhhhhhhhh. No. I haven't. I
am The Worst Wife Ever. I even have the shoes, too. See, I bought
them for my wedding because I thought they looked like glass
slippers. No, my wedding was not held at a strip club.
I will do something that
Lessee. Something I did…on
purpose, presumably…that scared me. Well, there's this one
stretch of trail on Tiger Mountain that is really really steep
and when you come down it you have to do a little running step
to keep from falling and I'm always scared I'm going to plow
directly into the people coming up the trail, but I've done the
trail like three times this summer. Does that count? No? Yeah,
Ooh, wait, I know! I signed
up for JournalCon, even though I'm scared of being a giant horking
I will go on an incredible
I'm gonna give myself this
one. Our cruise was pretty dang awesome.
I will drink more water.
"More", eh? That's
a nice non quantifying term.
I will try not to take so
"So much", eh?
I will paint my nails more
"More often" - oh,
I'll stop that. I definitely have been painting my toenails on
a regular basis. Go me!
I will make at minimum one
non work-related friend.
How pitiful is it that I listed
that as a goal for the year, you know? But yes, I have.
Like you! And you!
I will go to the doctor.
Yeah, to try and get rid of
that stupid fucking cold. It sucked.
I will try and write in this journal more often.
Hrm. No, I don't think I've
really kicked it up a notch, entry-posting-wise.
I will somehow, without
actually having to be a TWoP recapper or talented/seasoned journalist,
get my diary linked on Damn Hell Ass Kings.
This one? Is just embarrassing.
I will not let my face get
sunburned this summer.
I have tried to be better about
sunscreen this summer. It's true. However, my forehead is currently
a little peely from getting thoroughly roasted two weeks ago.
So...no, I didn't stick to this one.
I will be gracious about
turning 29 and not make big annoying squawks about being dangnear30.
I think yesterday's entry pretty much qualifies as a big annoying
squawk. I have failed yet again!
I will make JB take ballroom
dancing lessons with me.
I will plant a magnolia
I have not. But! We did plant
a pretty little Japanese maple just the other day. Our nosy neighbor
even called to say how much she liked it.
I will go hiking and camping
With the exception of the week
of the Fourth of July, I have not camped ONCE this summer. NOT
ONCE. We have, though, done a decent amount of hiking.
I will floss.
Uh…yes. I have, technically,
flossed since January 1, 2003.
Well, well, well! What a glowing
list of proud achievements! What an amazing testament to the
glory of human perseverance! What a -
Fuck it. I'm going to go soak
in a hot bath. I leave you, for no good reason, with this:
Bow chicka wow WOW!
go back :::
comments so far.
I have moved. - 1.03.2005
Obviously, a work in progress. - 12.27.2004
Happy holidays! - 12.24.2004
Listen, I am not a complete dick, it's not like I want Joe to die alone surrounded by cats or something. - 12.23.2004
Plus I am convinced my butt is extra big when it's upside down. - 12.22.2004