03.28.2003 - 1:51 p.m.
I'm at home instead of at work
today, and can I just say that god DAMN our phone rings all FUCKING
day long. And it's not, you know, ARAGORN calling to pledge his
undying love or anything, it's freaking TELEMARKETERS who just!
Keep! Calling! What demographic do they have us in? "Mouth-breathers
who sit at home all day waiting to purchase dubious long distance
calling plans", apparently.
JB's due to arrive in about
an hour, so in honor of his return I ran the vacuum halfheartedly
for a minute or two. That is just the type of goodhearted wife
I am, people. I also carefully placed one of his shoes on top
of the deer head in our office.
Yes, there's a "head"
in our "office", and I'm not really a Big Fan of the
head, but JB is a hunter type and let's just be glad there's
only ONE head, okay?
Anyway, I put things on the
head all the time. Like a thong, carefully slung over its horns.
A paper thought balloon with a crude comment protruding from
its snout. I always think this is SO funny and he never
notices. He finally gets perplexed by my chortling and I have
to point out the condom dangling from the ear, or whatever.
Then he pretends to be all annoyed and demands that I show the
head more respect.
It is true that I am quite
So I'm guessing he won't see
the latest head-desecration anytime soon, but I'll be snickering
about it all day. A shoe! On its forehead! Hee!
We have plans to go to sushi
tonight, at the goofily named Tuna House which is just down the
street. It's our new favorite thing to do on a Friday night -
head down there and sit at the sushi bar, order vats of sake
and beer, and stuff ourselves like pelicans.
However. There is a dark side
to the Tuna House. You see, we have found
We have seen Couple Nemesis
on several sushi outings now. They look about the same age as
JB and I. Couple Nemesis always takes the coveted seats that
are directly in front of the chef. They easily banter with the
chef, and order the most exotic looking - and expensive!- menu
But what really makes them
our mortal Couple Enemy is that they always take the paper wrappers
from their chopsticks and expertly fold little fucking ORIGAMI
SWANS that they then rest their chopsticks on.
I mean, really.
So clearly tonight we've got
to order, like, blowfish, and fold something utterly cool
that will amaze all the sushi patrons.
comments so far.
I have moved. - 1.03.2005
Obviously, a work in progress. - 12.27.2004
Happy holidays! - 12.24.2004
Listen, I am not a complete dick, it's not like I want Joe to die alone surrounded by cats or something. - 12.23.2004
Plus I am convinced my butt is extra big when it's upside down. - 12.22.2004