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01.15.2003 - 7:10 p.m.

Wednesday

Oh my GOD. This? So, so funny. Excerpt from Legolas's diary:

Day Six:

Far too dark in Mines of Moria to brush hair properly. Am very afraid I am developing a tangle.

Orcs so silly.

Still the prettiest.

BWAH!

And there's this from Sauron:

Day Three Million Seven:

I spy with my big-huge-nasty-flaming eye...something resembling a novelty dashboard ornament. Witch King of Angmar tells me it's a hobbit. Is rather cute. On the smallish side, but I'm hardly one to talk appearances these days.

HAR!

Yes, still ridiculously besotted enough to comb the web looking at LOTR stuff. It's sick and wrong. And incredibly geeky. What is happening to meeeeee?

Speaking of geeky (brilliant segue, no?), when we were in San Francisco for the tradeshow last week we got a tour of Pixar. They have a pretty incredible office space, with giant wood floors that employees glide across on skateboards. A neat experience, except for the part where the guy doing the tour launched into some complex technical animation stuff which slowly became unrecognizable as English and was replaced by a faraway roaring sound, like something coming from a seashell. I contemplated crumpling to the floor and faking a seizure, but settled for displaying a charmingly moronic, slack-jawed expression.

I consider myself a person of reasonable intellect - I can operate a vehicle, for instance, and I can tie my own shoes. But the techie stuff literally strips the neurons from my brain and leaves me with only a vague command over my motor skills.

We used to have these weekly staff meetings at Workplace that would last 2 hours or more, while engineers wrangled over various coding issues. Both myself and Molly would slump into comas, and blearily stagger from the room afterwards with arms outstretched like zombies. Luckily, they changed the format to address business issues first, then the technical stuff - at which point I launch from the room like rabid weasels have clamped onto my ass.

Basically, it boils down to this: I don't know how things work, and I am unable to understand if you try and explain. Sure, that might make me look stupid when I have to ask a Workplace propellerhead for the fiftieth time how I access that one drive ("Um, do what? What is this thing you call 'log in'?"), but on the bright side, I am CONSTANTLY AMAZED. Planes? Giant hunks of metal that can FLY? Wow! The talking automatic checkout thingie at my grocery store? COOL! Electricity? Dude, that stuff rules!!!

I know, it's pathetic. I feel like a Malibu Stacy doll: "Thinking too much gives you wrinkles."

:::

JB's taking off for Asia again this weekend, and he'll be gone for TWO WEEKS. Gah! Two weeks of frisbee-throwing, every single day! I wish during the wet dreary winter months Dog could find a nice frisbee alternative, such as cross stitching.

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